So You Think You Can Dance?

Well, I know that I can’t. I think its my hips. I just don’t have the hip control to make dancing look natural, so I generally stay off the dance floor. However, despite my general disdain for reality television, I really like So You Think You Can Dance. The performances are really fantastic and dance is one of the few visual arts that hasn’t been totally over saturated by our culture.

In fact, I feel like, for once, the people on a reality TV are getting famous for something. Let’s be honest here, the people on American Idol have been mostly underwhelming. Everyone on MTV’s shows are picked because they are either rich and stupid or so emotionally retarded that they’ll constantly churn out “good” television. On SYTYCD (sadly, a terrible acronym), these performers are really talented and are genuinely challenged by a wide variety of styles.

Of course, there is one annoying spot in this otherwise excellent television program: Mary Murphy. She’s the shrill, nasally judge that likes to scream and is always too harsh if she doesn’t like something and too excited when she does. Also, on Wednesday night’s show she looked like someone had attacked her with a Bedazzler. She needs a new wardrobe. Good thing the Nigel is the best and most balanced stodgy British judge on the American reality television circuit, otherwise it might make even a show full of talented people not worth watching.

For the record, the favorite couple in our house is Twitch and Kherrington. She is not only phenomenally talented, but she is SO hot to boot. Unless she seriously gaffs someplace along the line, I fully expect her to be in the top four. Twitch has a good shot to get into the top four as well. He’s talented, he’s surprisingly good at partnering and he’s more likable that just about anyone on that show. However, the humble and gentle nature of Joshua might put him into the top two guys instead, alongside the obvious choice Will.

Yes, I still hate reality TV and you’ll never convince me that the vast majority of it isn’t inane garbage preying on the stupidity of America… but I can confidently say that So You Think You Can Dance is worth watching.

Juno

I finally got around to watching Juno last night. Casey borrowed the DVD from someone at work and we spent a couple hours on the couch watching it together. I know it won all sorts of awards and whatnot, but we had heard mixed reviews from friends in our own age bracket. Between the people that thought it was the funniest thing they had seen in the last year, the people that thought it was culturally relevant look at teenage pregnancy and the people that thought it was kinda boring, I wasn’t sure if it would strike a chord with me. But we had the DVD and a little time to kill, so we popped into the Xbox 360 and watched.

My thoughts? It was funny, clever and managed to not be a total waste of my evening. I didn’t think it was groundbreaking and I don’t think its an “important” film. It was just an entertaining movie. The dialogue was Whedon-esque in its pacing and clever vocabulary. The characters were likeable and felt more like real people than the flat characters we usually get in movies about families and teenagers. Juno’s parents, in particular, were really excellently played.

I don’t know if I can recommend it to everyone, but Juno ended up being better than I expected. If you are interested in the film but haven’t checked it out yet, it could be an entertaining use of some hours that you might have to kill.

The Bachelor is Scripted

There. I said it. Millions of American women would hate me for saying it if they had any idea who I was and bothered to read my blog. But its true. While I’m sure that the women on the show have little idea of what is going on behind the scenes, the Bachelor and the Producers of the show probably meet on a consistent basis to discuss not just how he feels about the women, but also about what moves to make next to keep ratings high.

My wife has been watching The Bachelor: London Calling on Monday nights the last few weeks. While she has never really followed previous seasons very closely, Casey found out that the ex-girlfriend of a friend of ours here in North Carolina was going to be on the show, so she wanted to watch and see the girl’s progress. I still wasn’t interested in the show, but I have a stack of good books I’ve been working on since Christmas, so sitting on the couch with Casey on Monday’s is a good way for me to spend a little time with her and still enjoy my own separate hobby. So each week I grab a book (I’m currently reading “Brewing Up a Business: Adventures in Entrepeneurship”) and join Casey for TV and reading. I get a lot of reading done, but I am also able to follow along with what is going on in the show.

Last week I was in the middle of a page about branding for small business when I realized the television show we were watching wasn’t “reality” television at all. We were watching a scripted story. I know because I write for a living and have done so for quite a few years now. I know that whether a writer is working on a piece of sports journalism, writing a novel or scripting a video game, the ultimate goal is to tell a story. This is certainly true for television shows as well and I knew that we were watching a story unfold before us. I put my book down, watched for a few more minutes and then told Casey exactly who was going home 10 minutes before the rose ceremony. I was dead on.

This week I decided that I wanted to experiment with my theory that the show was heavily scripted. I decided to actually watch the entire show and only read during commercial breaks. I watched the tennis & tea date and picked Chelsea out as the girl to get the “first impression” rose. Correct on call #1. Amanda getting a rose during the one-on-one date was a no-brainer so I don’t even consider that a call that needed to be made.

Then came the epic two-on-one date that pitted Holly against Marshana, the only black woman on the show this season. The show built tension surrounding the date, with all the girls and probably most of the audience assuming this was an easy win for Holly. They even showed Marshana saying “I might as well pack my bags.” From a storytelling perspective, this told me that Holly was going home. Why? Because Americans love an underdog, because “shocking moments” are what propel a reality show’s ratings and (I hate to admit that people think this way) because she’s black. Over the course of the season, Matt has shown kindness towards Marshana, but very little romantic interest. I think its good for the ratings to keep her around and even better to pit her against a woman that some people automatically assumed was a favorite to win. Matt would look racist if he kicked her off the show too early, which would hurt his image and the image of the show. So by setting her up as a sympathetic character in this episode and giving her the big win despite all signs pointing to her going home, they’ve renewed in the minds of viewers that The Bachelor is really looking for true love and any of the girls left could be the winner. It was a great storytelling device to keep interest high and make millions of women second-guess the favorites they have already picked out in their minds.

For the record, I also picked Kelly and Ashlee as the two to go home at the rose ceremony. Why? Kelly has been shown on the edge of drunkenness more than once on the show. This was done for a reason. The show wants to glamorize and moralize The Bachelor, even though its really about a man who makes out with multiple women and strings them all along in his “quest for true love.” Without being crass and blatantly calling her out for drunkenness, they showed how it hurt her chances at finding a “classy” man when she made a fool of herself by showing off her breasts to Matt right before the ceremony. Then, just in case anyone was feeling sorry for her, they made sure to air her quasi-drunken tirade about how awesome she was before the show was over. Moralizing complete. White women aged 18-45 all over America feel justified in wanting Kelly to go home.

Ashlee was just a victim of flat character development and the process of elimination. Shayne is hot, young and exciting while Robin gets to play the eager love-struck girl in conflict with the other women. Those are important characters that appeal to different audience demographics. That left Noelle and Ashlee. Noelle has been portrayed as the wall-flower that is scared of getting overlooked. Her storyline isn’t complete yet because Matt hasn’t given her a chance to shine on her own. That leaves Ashlee, who never really developed beyond being the girl with a pretty voice. She didn’t have a story to tell and she wasn’t going to capture as large a “fanbase” as Noelle would. That meant it was her time to go home.

Of course, I know that post-production is a beautiful thing. Writers and producers are able to insert story and conflict where there is little that exists naturally. I understand that in an effort to tell stories, they can manipulate the footage they’ve collected and create story. That was clearly demonstrated with Marshana last night. They showed footage of the other girls talking about how Holly was definitely coming home. They showed footage of Matt reassuring Holly when she said how scary the experience is. I have to admit that it was good post-production work. So I guess that needs to be taken into account when I call the show “scripted.”

I don’t think that in real life, these stories play out quite so perfectly to make good television. Here’s what I think happened. Matt picked a few favorites after the first night he met them. In fact, he may have been given information about them beforehand to help narrow the field. Women like the drunk girl who stuck her panties into his pocket on the first night are selected specifically to make a fool of themselves and go home on the first night. The other women are all “cast” to fit particular roles and the producers meet with Matt to orchestrate the direction of each date and rose ceremony. Does anyone think it was a coincidence that Holly and Marshana were put on a date together? Me neither. Of course, Matt has a say in who sticks around, but I highly doubt the women go home in the order he would have picked. He probably has a few girls in mind and the rest are just casualties of reality television.

If anyone needs more convincing that the show is scripted and mostly fictional, go look up the show on Wikipedia. Out of 11 completed seasons, only one bachelor, the pro bass fisherman, is still involved with the woman he picked at the end of the show. The rest of them broke up almost immediately after the show aired. The relationships and experiences on this show are fabricated through storytelling to capture an audience and drive ratings. The Bachelor doesn’t have anything more to do with finding true love than Pro Wrestling has to do with finding the best fighter. It’s just entertainment.